There’s another morbid reason to do this: When you’re gone whoever’s left has to pick up the pieces and carry on.
It is irrational but I’ve started to really worry about this should anything suddenly happen to me. My spouse has been so removed from the finances for so long that if I wasn’t here there would likely be some serious issues in the short term.
This thread is a good reminder to try to minimize a bit. And that even if don’t follow the minimization I need to have everything clearly written out and instructions on what to do. I’m talking about simple stuff like paying the mortgage, what credit cards we have, what 20 different checking accounts have $1500 in them to avoid monthly fees.
I have tried my best to prepare DH for this so he knows the mechanics of all these. I also have a notebook where everything he needs to know is there including PWs. He knows where to look to see our CC balance and bank statements. We use a motherPW+name of site we do in a particular way. Heaven forbid we go at the same time, nothing else we can do. My eldest daughter also knows this but not to the extent that DH knows.
I don’t try to overanalyze it, I just try to do my best and que sera, sera.
Yes, no doubt. However, It’s pretty simple. My wife (daughter as contingency) gets a huge chunk of money the moment I die, and everything will be fine for at least 10 years for them, without generating a cent of income on behalf of my wife.
401k and IRAs have similar beneficiary setups. I told her to let all of my accounts die out and if people come knocking, show them a copy of the death cert and move on with life. She has her own accounts at various locations that are well established and easy to manage for her. My accounts don’t mean anything once I’m gone.
I worry more about paying accounts during a period of temporary incapacitation rather than death. To this end, the paper statements are a bonus. Although access to my phone or computer would get him in
I’ve got instructions in a document on my computer, backed up in a couple of places, for my husband so he knows how to carry on. I suspect he’d probably pare things down over time and develop his own system.
I have the same for my 2 kids, with main emphasis on how to easily get their inheritance. I’ve shown them where it is. Aren’t I a trusting soul?
I need to get on that. Right now, I’m lucky enough in that most of our high value assets are able to have beneficiaries designated, so a will isn’t a huge concern financially. However, for our daughter’s custody/care, it becomes a very anxiety-driven thought process that I tend to just block out of my head… not smart.
My biggest issue is who to put in charge should we both die. I’ve been advised by legal council to have one person in charge of the money (ideally in a trust) and a different person/persons having the kids live with them and take care of them. My problem is I don’t know anyone responsible enough to be the administrator of a huge insurance payout to a trust, but I do know people who I would want to take care of my kids.
I think we do need a thread for this stuff, I’m taking this OT quickly.
Make it into a business. Personally, if you paid me $100/hour plus expenses for my time, I’d administer your trust when you die and follow guidelines for how you want your children to access the money. I’m sure you can find a financial advisor type fiduciary to perform this function. If the legal documents are drawn up properly, it would be difficult for the administrator to steal from the trust.
Absolutely! I feel blessed that I married someone who isn’t just talkative but a great listener. We’re the type who can finish each other’s sentences, we make a great team!
